Blue Christmas

Grace be to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Amen.

I don’t know how many times over my lifetime I have heard the Christmas story as told by Luke, the story of Jesus’ birth we just read. It is always the same story, and yet, every year a different aspect of that story catches my attention. This year, it was this verse: Joseph also went from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to the city of David called Bethlehem, because he was descended from the house and family of David.

Joseph and his young wife Mary travel to Bethlehem. Why? Because of the census, says the Bible. However, I wonder if there is another reason for this trip: Joseph is going home. He is going to the town where he grew up, to the place where his extended family lives, to the house that is filled with memories and that stands for safety and love.

Life is challenging for Joseph. He is a woodworker, which means he doesn’t have land to farm and instead has to hire himself out to work for others; he is a day-laborer, who hopes every day that he will find work and earn some money. Now that he has a wife and is about to become a father, the pressure of making a living is increasing.

Additionally, the country is occupied by the Roman army. In many ways, the occupying force asserts their powerful presence, restricting the freedoms and increasing the taxes of people like Joseph.

With all this going on in his life, Joseph wants to go home. He wants to be where he is surrounded by the love and support of family, where things are familiar and comfortable, where he can relax and be restored in mind and soul.

We all know this longing for home. We especially know it during the Christmas season. It is not by accident that so many movies circle around the theme of being home for the holidays.

Over 30 years ago, I was in the US as an exchange student from Germany. A classmate from seminary invited me to come and join her family in Illinois for Christmas. That was very nice of her. The family welcomed me warmly and included me in their family life.

I was doing fine, until it was Christmas Day and I began opening the package my parents had sent from Germany. There I sat, under someone else’s Christmas tree, that was decorated very differently than our tree at home; and all the carols were in English, not German; and certain cookies that had always been part of Christmas weren’t available; and I opened the lovingly wrapped gifts from home – and I lost it. I rushed to my guest room, closed the door, threw myself down on the bed, and cried. I was so homesick.

Christmas is full of memories, of traditions that warm our heart and move our spirit. Being home for Christmas is indeed the most wonderful time of the year.

Which makes it so upsetting when something changes. When a beloved person is no longer with us. When the family gathering moves to someone else’s home because grandma and grandpa no longer have the strength to host it. When adult children aren’t coming because they are now married and will attend their spouse’s family event. When we realize how we have changed and how others have changed and how nothing quite feels like it used to.

We want to go home for Christmas. We want the Christmas Eve experience we once knew and loved. The tree, the creche, the carols, the candles, the music, the packed pews – we yearn for that. We want Christmas to be familiar and comfortable. We want to be home.

Will we get that? I don’t know, but I have the feeling Christmas will not be the same as it once was. Things have changed. Families have changed. We have changed. I expect Christmas will have changed.

In that, we are in tune with the Christmas story.

Joseph is going home - and there is no room for him. He was yearning for the embrace of his family and the comfort of the house of his childhood, but his old room is occupied, and he and his wife get booted to the stable. He is home, but it isn’t the same as it once was.

However, there in that stable, the miracle happens. There in the disappointment of home not feeling like home anymore, God enters the scene. There in the confusion of change, the Son of God is born. Just when Joseph is upset, disoriented, anxious, God’s love touches him like never before and opens a whole new future.

 My mother was born in Germany in 1938. She lived through the Second World War, when the family had to escape from territories Germany lost to Russia and Poland. As a refugee family, they were placed in the barn of a farm in Northern Germany. There they celebrated the first post-war Christmas.

They had nothing. My grandfather made gifts for the family: knitting needles out of bicycle spokes for my grandmother and hand-carved wooden dice for the three children, which he patiently sanded until they ran true. My grandmother made candles out of wax remnants others had discarded.

It was not at all like the Christmas they had hoped for. None of the usual beloved trappings of the holiday were available. They yearned for home and yet knew that home would never be the same again.

Still, when they went to church that night, they heard the Christmas story and were reminded of the birth of our savior. They went back to their barn and sang Christmas carols about the good news of God made flesh. They shared their meager gifts, recognizing in them an effort of true love.

And in spite of their circumstances, joy began to fill their hearts. They realized that what is truly essential about Christmas is the fact that God’s love is born into this world and into our lives. At this very challenging time in the family’s life, the Christmas story gave them hope and the assurance that God’s love would accompany them into the future.

That Christmas as an exchange student when I broke into tears, I was also touched by the love of God. My host family was so very kind to me. When I emerged from my room with red eyes, they hugged me, told me to take my time, and eventually revealed that they had prepared gifts for me. I was so moved. In the end, even though all the surroundings did not feel like home, the story of Jesus’ birth and the love of God and God’s people made it a joyful Christmas.

Joseph goes home, only to discover that home is no longer the same. Yet that night, God’s love breaks into his life in a new and amazing way.

Joseph is now a father. He has a family. That changes things, but in a wonderful way. He feels all the joy and love and hope that comes with the birth of a child.

But this is not just any child, this is God entering the world. With this baby, God assures Joseph that God will be with him now and in the future, will guide him and love and support him and grant him the peace that passes all understanding.

New people enter Joseph’s life. The birth of God’s son creates a new community. Shepherds and wise men come and share their joy and their love of God and their faith as to what this baby means for them and the world. That whole barn is filled with wonder and awe and hope and the presence of God.

Even though that holy night started off all wrong, not feeling like home at all, I am sure that in the end, Joseph would describe it as a night full of wonder. Different than expected, yet amazing and moving and uplifting nonetheless.

My hope is that this will be our experience, too.

Our Christmas this year might be different than we had hoped for.

May we experience what Joseph experienced, and what my mother’s family experienced: God has ways of bringing his love into our lives in new and unexpected ways.

Listen to the old story of our savior’s birth and let it speak to you anew. Sing the familiar carols and hear their message of faith and wonder. Open yourself up to the presence of God in Christ that it might fill you with comfort and hope. Amen.